My grandfather passed away last Wednesday. He had cancer and we were told he had a couple of months to live so it came as a shock that those months were shortened to just weeks. My biggest regret was that I wasn't able to talk to him before he left. I thought to myself that there will be time. I had several excuses for postponing my call, that work and Aqui was making us too busy, or that my pregnancy was difficult that I was tired all the time. Just excuses, really. Now that I think of it, I was scared. I wasn't ready to face the fact that my grandfather was dying.... And because I'm such a coward, I wasn't able to say goodbye.
My last dream before I woke up was of my grandfather. I dreamt that I went to our old house to drop off some food and as I was leaving, I heard my grandfather's voice calling, asking me "Are you not going to say goodbye to me?". I turned and saw him in his usual white sando and shorts, on a blue bed, beside some hospital equipment. I ran towards him, gave him a hug and walked away, waving goodbye as I said, "Bye bye Lolo.". And with that, I woke up with a shiver in my spine and cold sweat on my forehead.
Thank you Lolo for giving me a last chance to say goodbye.
